Life Is Not Forever ~ Love Is
In Celebration of the Lives of
Jason & Andrew Colvard
I wanted to share a story with you…
In October we returned ‘home’ to California where I was born and raised and where my son and grandson, Jason and Andrew, were also born, each of us in the same country hospital in rural Sonoma County. We felt a deep need and longing to gather with our family for a small memorial service to honor our ‘boys’. We had waited until we felt it was ‘safe enough’ to travel with my elderly Mother, and when there was a small window when the virus was less rampant, we flew. We gathered at my Mother’s old family farm on a warm October day to sing praises of Jason and Andrew, share stories, and take comfort with each other. My family had purchased two beautiful Ginkgoes’ that we planted side by side in the field next to my Mom’s home. There they will grow for centuries as Ginkgoes are known to do, growing from the ashes we planted in the soil and holding the memories of Jason and Andrew in their strong limbs and beautiful leaves.
The next morning, we carried their ashes, their stardust, to the old family burial plot in the Sonoma Mountain Cemetery where my Grandparents are buried. I’ve long loved this sacred space, where souls have been put to rest under the old oak forest that grows wild in the volcanic landscape. As we knelt in prayer over Jason and Andrew’s Memorial Stone, my brother placed an olive branch on the headstone. Wondering where the olive branch came from in this old oak forest, my brother pointed above; directly above us was one lone old and gnarled olive tree, a symbol of peace and renewal, growing amidst the oak forest.
That afternoon, returning home, we went out to circle the Ginkgo trees and to sing one final parting song before we all left for our homes again. As we began to sing,
“Fly like an Eagle,
Flying so high,
Circling the Universe
On wings of pure light”
Right above us, two beautiful white shoulder Hawks appeared and began to circle above and around us… singing with us in their high-pitched tones. They circled and sang above us the entire time we were singing, and as we finished the last verse, these two beautiful hawks flew off…. into the star world and the world of spirit beings.
With love and light,
Rosemary
Peace, my heart, let the time for the parting be sweet.
Let it not be a death but completeness.
Let love melt into memory and pain into songs.
Let the flight through the sky end in the folding of the wings over the nest.
Let the last touch of your hands be gentle like the flower of the night.
Stand still, O Beautiful End, for a moment,
and say your last words in silence.
I bow to you and hold up my lamp to light you on your way.
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die…
Jason and Andrew were huge animal lovers and cared passionately for the well-being of animals.
The family had four pit bulls that lived with them and many feral cats that they adopted and cared for. Their four dogs, Beau, Cita, Gremlin, and Buddy, were taken to the Oconee County Animal Control who did an outstanding job of caring for them, and finding loving homes for each of them. They were soon adopted out to loving families. The kitties were fostered out in several homes and were cared for by Campus Cats, a non-profit organization that cares for homeless cats.
In Memory of Jason and Andrew, we invite you to make a donation to the Friends of Oconee County Animal Shelter or to your local animal shelter.
Donations can be made via mail or online. Please include a memo stating:
In memory of Jason and Andrew
Donate via mail:
Local Dog & Cat Shelter
Oconee County Animal Service
1171 Branch Road
Bishop, GA 30621
Campus Cats
P.O. Box 902
Watkinsville, GA 30677
[email protected]
Update: Beau, Buddy, Cita, and Gremlin have all been adopted by wonderful, caring families!
Stories keep the memories alive and bring the departed spirits back to life. If you have a story that you’d like to share about Jason or Andrew, please share it here.
“Thank you for the stories; they are manna to the heart. And thank you for your love and support this past year. We felt it deeply. It was only because of the love and support of family and friends that we were able to bear what was truly unbearable”
Dearest Rosemary and Robert and family, Jason and Andrew were such amazing humans . Jason’s sparkle always made me think a little more about things and Andrew’s sweetness warmed my heart. I celebrate their lives and mourn their loss. The depth of grief is only equaled by the depth of love. I light a candle to help shine their way forth.
Your friend always all ways, With Love, Light and Courage, Jane
Dear Rosemary,
My heart breaks for you. Stories are powerful and these two beautiful people filled your stories and built a web of connection that is incomprehensible. You planted memories of these souls in so many ways. Your laughter, describing riding on horseback with your young son through the wilds of California. A glimpse of Andrew, a teenager at Sage Mountain, while I was an apprentice. Melanie’s teenage stories of moving to Sage and meeting Jason. Eleanor, sharing stories each summer at the WHC. All of this weaves a web that draws us together. This loss is so tragic and my heart aches for your entire family. Sending all my love to you, Rosemary, Robert, Jasmine, Melanie, Jeff, Lily, Eleanor, Jennifer and Keith.
Love, Katy
I got to meet Jason and Andrew when Andrew was just about 5. I was hanging out with him at Sage Mountain, it was not a usual babysitting post we just hung out while workshops were in session. He was strikingly intelligent and vitally awake. We spent those few days wandering the woods and gardens. He knew all the plants, not just their names but knew them like buddies. He and I rearranged and read so many books those few days. Jason made wonderful food and healthy smoothies for everyone. I appreciated the love he
Jason put into making. I felt very well received and cared for at Sage Mountain. I met Andrew once more at Phoenix Books in Burlington VT at a talk about Herbs for Men. I got to see him all grown up. I certainly will never forget Andrew or the brief moment I met Jason. I have always thought of Rosemary as a real life fairy godmother as she shares and embodies so much warmth, love and wisdom. I will always be grateful for meeting all of you and for all the ways your healing is part of our everydays. Be well. Our thoughts and deepest prayers are with you. Peace and love from Rachael Levine O’Donnell (Marti’s Daughter)
So many memories of Jason and Andrew swirling in my mind. My heart is breaking as I try to write them down. Apologies if they are all over the place and for writing a long entry but as I read these posts, I realize how hungry I am for stories about Jay and Andrew and feel all of these memories being shared are so incredibly precious…from so many different parts of their lives and the people they loved and touched. …….I never want to stop reading them…so I’ll add a few of my own here tonight. Appreciate everyone’s words and the glimpses they continue to give us into their beautiful souls.
Jason–I will never forget meeting you for the first time when we were 13 and 17 both awkward teens trying to find our way in the world and in a new family. I remember our shared basement bedroom, separated by a sheet hanging between us. Whispering late into the night and making totally irreverent jokes about our crazy parents. Driving to school in your green Impala!!. How you taught me to clean the ball bearings of your skateboard with gasoline, introducing me to punk music and the art of mason jar coffee. I remember you chasing me around the kitchen with the raw turkey (that Rosemary didn’t know how to cook) and teaching me how to make homemade napalm to burn green brush piles–we were lucky we didn’t burn down the mountain. I remember you as a young father and the pride you had for your boy- the most fierce and pure love you circled him with–unending and incredible. So many memories…thank you brother for your wildness, your love and the edge you walked, for you–one-of-a-kind–Starman.
Andrew-Roo- So dear, so precious– you with a heart-of-gold, generous, kind-SO kind and simply brilliant!. I will miss you so much dear one. I remember when you were just a babe and those beautiful eyes and smile. Always moving. Always curious. Then as a young man the playfulness and sweetness that you shared with us even in the hardest time. And oh how you embraced Lily and made her feel so loved. Her amazing older cousin who would help her put on fake nails (gluing down your own hand in the process!), making ASMR videos w her late-night in the top of our dorm at Wheaton College, adventures to graveyards and oh such loud Russian music on our car rides. Thank you for answering her late-night instas, snapchats and facetime calls and for loving & supporting her. Treasuring the memories of our family ski adventures and watching you help weave magic at the IHS…Andrew we miss you so much and love you always. Circling you with unending prayers and the brightest light.
Endless prayers of love and support to Rosemary & Robert, Val and Eleanor & all of their beloveds. Holding you all so close to my heart. xoxo mel
During these most difficult days of deep grief and loss, I hold you Rosemary Robert Jesse Elenor Val and All your beloved family in my sad heart.
Bless you for creating this space where we can share our Love for Jason and Andrew who are on their new journey.
Jason.: i watched you grow from a young and sometimes troubled young boy into a caring insightful and generous man. You helped me so many times as you listened to my own struggles. I loved you in life. I love you in forever.
Andrew. In your young life you searched the great mysteries and had unique and brilliant insights. may your next journey bring you the answers you seek.
I believe our collective Love and Grief will lift these precious souls onto their highest road. .
Thank you All for sharing such caring prayers.